Awake
by brittsan2024
Summary: After a tragic car accident, Rachel Berry has to pick up the pieces of her life and learn how to move on from Quinn's death. But after Quinn's funeral Rachel wakes up to find Quinn very much alive. She soon realizes she has one reality where Quinn has died and another where Quinn survived. The only problem she doesn't know which reality is real and which is just a dream. FABERRY
1. Chapter 1

"Rachel, honey, you need to get up," whispered Kurt.

I ignore him, praying that he will just let me sleep a little longer and dream of nothing but her face. Why won't they just leave me alone, I just want to stay in this bed forever. This can't be happening, this can't be my life. That's the only thought that has been replaying in my head since I got that phone call. The phone call to tell me my wife was in a car accident and that despite their best efforts didn't make it.

"Rachel, come on I know this is hard but we need to get you ready," I hear the sadness and desperation in Kurt's voice. He's trying to be there for me, they all are really, but no one understands this feeling. No one loved her the way I did, she was my whole life and was taken away from me in an instant.

I can hear soft footsteps and silent cries as someone walks in the bedroom. I feel Kurt get off the bed and walk toward them "I've tried to get her up but she is just laying there, I don't know what to say to get her up Tina."

"Why don't you go down stairs for a little bit and I will get her ready," Tina urged while walking around the bed and sitting down on the floor right in front of my face.

Tina grabs my hand, "Rachel, I've got your clothes ready and the shower running. We need to get you ready for the funeral."

Slowly I open my eyes and look at Tina but I don't say a word. I can see her fighting with herself on what to say to help me through this. I want to yell and scream how there is no way in hell I will ever be ready for this funeral, to say goodbye to the love of my life. But I know that it won't help it won't change the fact that she is gone and I'm left here figuring out how to go on without her.

"I just got off the phone with your dads, they will be here in an hour," Tina says trying to pull on my hand to get me up. But I just lay there with a blank stare not even fully registering what she is saying. All I think of is her, all I see in my head is my wife.

Another ten minutes goes by and both of us haven't moved, Tina just keeps looking at me and I finally look at her and decide to say something. "I don't think I can do this Tina," I softly cry out.

Tina looks at me almost startled that I even spoke. "I know sweetie but we are all here for you, you are not going to go through this alone. Lets just take this one step at a time okay. All you have to do right now is just take a shower and we will go from there okay."

"Okay," is all I can force out as I slowly get up and walk toward the bathroom. Quietly I shut the door and strip off my tank top and shorts. Stepping in the shower I let the water slowly cascade down my body and I just stand there thinking of the last time I was in the shower.

_Flashback_

"_Ugh babe," I yell out but I hear nothing in response. "Quinn," I yell again annoyed that she isn't responding. _

_I hear the door open and Quinn walk in "What baby? Why are you yelling?"_

"_Did you use the last of the shampoo?" I asked already knowing the answer. Quinn doesn't answer at first, she knows I hate when she uses the last of something and forgets to replace it. I feel the shower curtain slowly peel back and a guilty looking blonde appears and hands a new shampoo bottle to me._

_I sigh and take the bottle from her. "See that's not so hard is it. When you use that last of the shampoo get under the sink and put a new bottle in the shower," I say sarcastically. _

"_But I like getting it for you when you are already in the shower baby," she replies giving me a sly look. _

"_Oh and why is that?" But before I get my answer the curtain is being pulled back and I hear Quinn walk away. I sigh in frustration wondering why she would say that and then walk off. Before I can finish that thought the curtain is being pushed back and a sexy naked blonde is climbing in._

"_Because then I get to see you all naked and wet for me," she whispers in to my ear nibbling on it. My breathing is already starting to pick up and I am at a loss for words. The things this woman does to my body, I go from being irritated to all hot and bothered by just a few words and a nibble to the ear._

_Gathering myself I look into Quinn's dark lust filled eyes and pull her close to me. "You are something else you know that," I reply. Quinn smirks at me and pushes her lips onto mine._

A hard knock on the door jolts me back to reality. "Rachel, your dads just got here are you almost done in the shower," Tina yells from behind the door.

"Yeah I'll be done in just a sec," I reply shaking the flashback from my head. Finishing my shower I step onto the rug and look at myself in the mirror. My eyes are swollen and red, my face puffy and lifeless. I'm startled by my reflection I almost don't recognize the person in the mirror.

Zipping up my black lace dress and finishing the last of my makeup I look toward the door. I go to grab the handle and stay there for a minute. All I want to do is take this dress off climb back into bed and not deal with anyone right now. But I know that's not an option I have to get down there before they send someone else to come get me. I try to prepare myself for what is going to come next. How do I prepare for a day that I know is going to be the hardest day of my life? How do I prepare to say goodbye to my wife, best friend, and love of my life?


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note: Thank you so much for the reviews and follows. This is my first fan fiction story so be nice :) haha. All errors are mine and I apologize now for any of them. This is mostly faberry but will have small parts from friends and family. Story has some hints of glee and loosely based off a tv show also called Awake that is not on anymore.**

**This chapter will start right after the funeral and the next will begin the back and forth between Rachel's realities. There will be some flashbacks but will mostly stay in the present time. It will mostly be Rachel POV but sometimes won't be.**

**I'm not sure yet about how often I will update I am a busy college student. But I will try to update at least 1-2 times a week. Hope everyone enjoys the story. Also, I do not own glee, awake, or any of the characters I use. Here we go!**

Sitting in the car I look up to the house that used to hold such hope and promise for Quinn and I's future. Our dream home is all we thought when we bought it, a beautiful white Victorian house with red shutters on the windows and a wrap around porch with a white porch swing that Quinn made for me. Seven months is how long it took us to find this perfect home that met every little detail we wanted. Coming home used to bring me such an excited feeling, it was the only place I wanted to be but now looking at it all I see it what I've lost.

Slowly I drag myself up the stairs and into the bedroom stripping off my black lace dress and putting on Quinn's old UCLA t-shirt and sweatpants. They are the only things I wear around the house anymore, I feel close to her when I wear them. And after the funeral all I want is to feel close to her, no I need to feel close to her.

Lying down in bed I turn to stare at the picture of us from a few months ago, a picture I have always hated until now. I hated that picture because I didn't even know Quinn was taking it at the time. She had woken up before me and made me a delicious vegan breakfast in bed, which she rarely ever does. Half asleep in the picture, she caught the moment I realized what she had done and was looking into her eyes with this goofy childlike smile on my face. Next think I know Quinn was snapping a picture and running off and loading it onto her computer. Quinn always said it was her favorite picture because she lived to make me smile that goofy smile.

Looking at the picture again I just stare at Quinn, she has the slightest smirk on her face and her beautiful blonde hair is cascading down her back. God how I miss that smirk, I can remember so many fights we had and she would pull that smirk and I would crumble and forget what the fight was even about.

_Flashback_

_Lightly tapping my fingers on the kitchen granite counter tops while looking at the clock growing increasingly more frustrated as the minutes pass by. I have tried to call Quinn threes times and no answer, looking down at my phone I debate calling her one more time. Suddenly, I hear the garage door opening and the sound of Quinn's black BMW pulling in._

"_Hey baby. How was your day?" Quinn asks while casually walking in and kissing my forehead._

_Sitting there I try to compose myself because all I want to do is go off on the blonde in front of me._

_She must have noticed my lack of an answer and finally looks up at me while putting her camera bag and keys on the kitchen counter. "Rach, wow you look beautiful! Did you have a meeting or something today."_

_Gathering myself I storm off up the stairs and slam the door leaving the blonde totally and utterly confused._

"_Hmm she must have had a bad day or something." Quinn mumbles quietly to herself. She goes to the fridge and pulls out a beer and takes a look at the calendar while taking a swig. Looking at today's date she finally realizes what made the brunette so mad. "Shit," Quinn says knowing she's going to have to figure something out to get out of trouble on this one._

_Stripping off my dress and throwing on my robe I hear Quinn's feet coming up the steps and a soft knock on the door. Not answering, Quinn quietly comes in and just stares at me with her puppy dog eyes and her best pout._

"_Baby," Quinn says but before she can go any further I put my hand up and stop her. _

"_Just don't Quinn."_

"_Rach, I'm really sorry my photo-shoot ran late and it just totally slipped my mind that it was date night."_

"_A date night you wanted and practically begged me for. I have been excited all day and even bought a new dress."_

"_I know. Work has just been so crazy and I must have forgotten to put it on my calendar at work."_

"_I tried calling you three times Quinn and nothing. Why even have a phone if you're not going to answer it," increasing my voice just a little._

"_You know I turn it off at photo-shoots because it distracts me. Baby please, I'm sorry. We can still go out, come on I can still take you to dinner." Quinn begs._

"_It's already almost 10 o'clock Quinn and I have an early meeting in the morning just don't worry about it." I walk into the closet and hang up my new dress that will have to be worn on another night. Feeling her starting at me I turn around and look at her waiting for Quinn to say something._

"_I meant what I said earlier, You look beautiful tonight."_

_I smile weakly at her, "Thank you."_

_Quinn starts to move toward me and puts her hands on my waist spinning me around and forcing me to look right into her eyes. Struggling to try and move back toward the bedroom she pulls me into a hug and whispers in my ear "Let me make it up to you baby."_

_Pulling back I see her starting to pull her smile into her HBIC smirk thinking she can get me to cave. But I quickly pull out of her embrace and start to head for the door. "Baby," I hear the blonde say and her words are just dripping with sex. All I hear is shuffling behind me but she's not moving toward me and it takes all I have to not turn around and look at her._

"_Rach, look at me please."_

"_No, because you are just trying to get out of this argument by using your sexiness."_

"_Well is it working?" I can hear the smirk in her voice. All I want to do right now is go to bed and be mad but my feet won't move, it's like they are planted in the ground. Slowly Quinn walks toward me and pulls my robe down past my shoulder and peppers kisses from my shoulder up to my neck making me moan at the contact. Quinn presses her body up against mine and it is them that I realize what all the shuffling was, my sexy ass wife is butt naked behind me. _

_She slowly slides her hand up my thigh and to my stomach until she reaches the tie to my robe. Tugging gently on the tie she undoes the knot and drops my robe to the floor pressing her breast into my back. _

"_Rach, turn around so I can make this up to you." Finally I cave and turn around to find nothing but Quinn and that smirk on her face and I know I'm done for._

_Pushing her lips against mine she swipes my bottom lip with her tongue begging for access and I give it to her easily. Her tongue wins the battle over dominance, not that I was putting up much of a fight. Grasping for air she pulls back and puts her lips against my ear._

"_I guess it is working," Quinn whispers while sucking on my ear lobe. _

"_Let me show you how sorry I am," Quinn begs while grinding her hips into mine._

"_Fine but don't think for a se…." before I could finish Quinn is shoving her tongue in my mouth and pushing me down on the closet floor and climbing on top of me. Sucking on my pulse point and dragging her tongue down the column of my neck I know this fight is long forgotten and all I can think to myself is damn that smirk._

Grabbing her pillow I softly cry at the memory. I wish I could go back in time, who cares if she forgot date night. I just want God to just give her back. Why did she have to die? We were just starting our future together, building a life, talking about kids. I feel my chest start to tighten as my cries get louder. Struggling to breathe I shoot up in bed and knock over the lamp on the side table. The lamp shatters all over the floor, my head starts to feel dizzy and I know I'm about to black out. Next thing I know my door slams open and my dads rush in the room.

"Rachel! You need to calm down and take a deep breath," my dad Leroy says calmly. But I continue to struggle, I grasp on to his shirt like it's the only thing that can save me.

"Look at me sweetie. Look right into my eyes," Leroy pleads. I stare deeply into his deep chocolate eyes and tighten my grip on his shirt. "Take a slow deep breath for me okay and listen to me. You are going to be okay. Just breathe for me baby. That's it Rachel slow deep breaths."

Finally, I start to feel my chest loosen up and my body starts to relax. After a few minutes I lie back down in bed and look up to my dads. "I'm so sorry Dad, I was just looking at this picture and thinking about Quinn and all of a sudden I couldn't breathe." I say still shaking from my panic attack.

Leroy squeezes my hand and replies, "It's okay sweetie, you don't have to apologize."

I feel the bed shift and see my dad turn look up to my daddy, "Elijah, why don't you go make Rachel a cup of tea with ginger in it."

Daddy kisses my forehead and tells me he will be right back. We sit there in silence until Daddy comes back with a cup of tea; I sit up in bed and take a sip.

"Do you want to talk about what you were thinking about Quinn before your panic attack?" Daddy asks with only but concern in his voice.

"Only if you're ready that is," I hear Dad chime in.

Setting my tea down I take a deep breath and look up at the men who have been the only thing helping me keep it together these past few days. "I was looking at this picture and asking God why he took her from me," I sigh still wanting the answer.

They sit there in silence unsure of what to say so I continue, "I shouldn't have let her walk out the door. Sunday is our day together. But she begged me, it was a beautiful day outside to take pictures and she said she was feeling inspired." Tears are streaming down my face, "If I had just made her stay home none of this would have happened."

"Honey you can't blame yourself for this. You didn't know there would be an accident, this is not your fault," Daddy says getting choked up.

"But I do feel that way. We had a rule no work on Sundays," I yell out. Startled by my outburst my Daddy slowly walks over and sits next to me. "I'm sorry Daddy, I shouldn't have yelled at you."

"There is no need to keep apologizing sweetie. You are going through something unimaginable, it's okay to react this way."

"I just want her back Daddy, I just want my wife back."

Daddy squeezes me tighter and starts rocking me back and forth, "I know sweetie, Shhh, I know."

I don't even know how long Daddy stays rocking me back and forth, rubbing my back. Feeling my eyelids getting heavy I softly close my eyes and feel my Daddy lie me down in bed and pull the covers over me. The last thing I hear is the soft click of the door before I drift off into a deep sleep.

"I don't know what to do if Rachel keeps having these panic attacks," muttered Leroy.

"It might be time to take Dr. Miller up on his offer and see if he can prescribe something for her to relax. This can't be healthy for her to keep having these attacks," countered Elijah.

"Do you think Rachel will be okay with that? I don't want her to get mad and lash out at us Elijah."

"Is there really any other choice at this point. I'm at a loss for what to do."

"Dr. Miller also recommended she see a therapist to help her deal with everything. Did you realize that's the most she has said about the accident since that day?" Leroy said with desperation in his voice.

"I was shocked she actually talked about it, her friends only know what happened from what we have told them. She has shut all of them out and they are all struggling to deal with there own grief to know what to do or say to help Rachel talk about it."

"Even at the funeral today Rachel just had this blank stare on her face like she couldn't comprehend what was going on around her. It's like she just walks around not dealing with anything until it all comes crashing down on her."

"Dr. Miller is right she needs help through this. I know we thought we could handle this Leroy but we need to face the fact that she needs more help than we can offer her."

Leroy looks desperately into Elijah's eyes and pulls him into a hug as he starts to cry. "I just don't want to lose our baby if we push her to hard Elijah. You know how stubborn she can be when she doesn't want to do something."

Elijah clings to Leroy and softly rubs his back, "I know honey but what other choice do we have at this point. Either road we choose could be dangerous but I honestly believe that this is what is best for her right now."

Leroy pulls backs and gives Elijah a soft kiss, "You're right Eli, I'm going to go call Dr. Miller right now and set something up."

Leroy walks to the kitchen and pulls out his cell phone dialing Dr. Miller's number. "Hi Dr. Miller. Yes, this is Leroy Berry I wanted to talk to you about taking you up on your offer to help Rachel."

Elijah sits down on the couch and lets out a deep sigh silently praying that he and his husband are making the right choice. Wishing his daughter's beautiful blonde were here to help them make this choice knowing that she is the only one who always knew what was best for Rachel.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews and follows, I really appreciate it. All errors are mine, sorry about that.**

**This chapter is the beginning of the switching between realities. I'm very excited about it. Will be mostly Rachel POV and is pretty much only faberry I will have friends and family in more of the other chapters. This chapter is longer than the others, which is how it will be from now on. Also, the chapter has sexytimes, fluff, and a lot of teasing so you have been warned, this is rated M ;). **

**Please review I would really like to hear from you all, I have lots of ideas ready for this story. Any comments or ideas just leave them and I might consider/use the ideas you want me to try. Thanks so much again.**

"Ughh" I groan as the buzzing of Quinn's alarm clock wakes me from my deep sleep. Leaning my arm up I lightly tap the annoying machine to turn it off. That's weird I could have sworn that I turned it off and unplugged it the other day. Figuring one of my dads must have plugged it back in I slowly start to drift back to sleep. Not even ten minutes later the alarm clock is buzzing again, I reach up to turn it off when I feel something shift behind me.

"Mmm I got it baby."

Jolted by the fact that someone is in my bed I turn around quickly ready to pounce on whoever the hell thought it was okay to get into my bed. But when I turn around I am startled by what I see. My beautiful blonde wife who died is looking right at me, I rub my eyes because I must be seeing things. Starring into her hazel eyes I reach my hand and slightly touch her face and I am shocked when I feel the warmth of her skin on my hand.

Pulling my hand away I get up from bed and run out of the bedroom and down the stairs to get a glass of water. I grab a bottle of water out of the fridge and take a gulp. Setting the bottle down I realize my hands are shaking uncontrollably. What the hell was that up there? How did I see and feel Quinn like that? All of these thoughts keep swirling around in my head. "You are officially loosing it Rachel," I quietly mumble to myself.

Finally convincing myself that it was just a very realistic dream or vision I walk back up the stairs and decide to lie back down in bed. Slowly I walk back in the bedroom and look at the bed and am met with nothing but sheets. "Just a realistic vision," I say to myself. Laying back down I start to feel my emotions get the better of me because oh how I wish that Quinn was really here right now.

Just as I am thinking that I see the bathroom door swing open and once again I am met with my gorgeous wife in her usual nightshirt and short shorts.

"Baby where did you run off to?" Quinn asks looking at me. I don't respond at first because all I can do is stare at the blonde in front of me. Quinn continues to look at me and raises her eyebrow waiting for me to answer.

"Quinn?" I squeak out.

"What's wrong baby? Why did you run off ?"

Still not answering I lean up on the bed and grab her hand and pull her back to bed with me. I pull her into a bone-crushing hug all the while wondering how this is happening. She is really here, my Quinn, my wife here in my arms. Pulling back I mash her lips into mine, I keep our lips together until we are both gasping for air.

"Well that's the best good morning kiss I've ever had," Quinn says looking deeply into my eyes.

"So are you going to tell me why you ran off downstairs Rach?"

"Oh umm, yeah sorry I just really needed a drink of water," I say as I kiss her lightly on the lips.

"Oh okay. I'm going to get up and take a shower," Quinn replies with confusion.

Quinn starts to get out of bed but I grab her hand and pull her back down again to lie with me causing her to look at me questioningly.

"I want to stay in bed with you a little longer," I fumble out searching for the right words to say so she doesn't think I've lost it.

I must have convinced her because I hear her mumble out "Mmm okay that sounds nice."

Pushing her hair back and tucking it behind her ear I look deeply into her stunning hazel colored eyes like it's the last time I will ever see them again.

I see Quinn blushing under my intense stare. "Not that I don't like this starring contest baby but why are you looking at me like that?"

"What do you mean Quinn?" I respond gently running my fingers lightly up and down her arm.

"You're looking at me like it's the first time you have ever seen me. And while I appreciate it I'm just wondering why that is."

Before I can even think of the right answer to tell her I cup her face gently and mash our lips together. I run my fingers through her blonde locks and pull her in closer to me rolling her over and laying on top of her. Gliding my tongue on her bottom lip I am immediately granted access and our tongues meet and all I see is fireworks. I could hear Quinn moan as our tongues met and began fighting for dominance. Honestly I didn't care who won I just wanted this moment to last forever.

Abandoning Quinn's bruising lips I place kisses across her jaw line and lick down her neck. Finding her pulse point I bite down hard and I feel Quinn buck her hips up into me.

"Fuck Rach. Baby that feels so good," I hear Quinn moan out as I continue my assault on her neck.

"I want you Quinn," I beg desperately. She grabs the back of my neck and pulls me down for another searing kiss, I pull our shirts off and toss them across the room. Immediately I grab both of her breasts kneading the flesh, I move my mouth down to one of her nipples and swirl my tongue around the hardening bud. I can feel Quinn writhing underneath me bucking her hips trying to get any type of friction.

"Rach…take me now."

Giving her nipple one last swirl, I trail open mouth kisses between the valley of her breasts and across her delicious abs. I slide my tongue down her abs one more time appreciating my wife's gorgeous toned body. Spreading her thighs open I slide her underwear down her legs leaving a trail of kisses as I go. I move back up her legs and spread her thighs apart and am met with her glistening sex.

"Mmm, you are so wet for me baby…" I bring my mouth down and take a long swipe through her folds. All I can hear is moans and I pull my tongue back into my mouth. "Shit, Quinn you taste so good…" I take another long swipe and then shove my tongue deep inside of her.

"Fuck," is all Quinn could say as I moved my tongue in and out of her. Feeling her walls tighten around my tongue I remove it and am met with a whimpering blonde beneath me. The whimpers soon turn back into moans as I push one finger into her replacing my tongue.

"Mmm don't stop Rach. Don't fucking stop."

Sliding a second finger I push deep inside my wife curling and drawing back slowly only to ram them back in. "Holy shit baby. I'm so close," this only turns me on more and makes me work harder to bring Quinn to blissful release. Taking her clit into my mouth I push deep inside her one more time and feel the sexy blonde arch of the bed and start to shake.

"Oh my…God baby," my wife screams out in ecstasy as she rides out her orgasm. Slowly pulling my fingers out I put them in my mouth and moan at how delicious she tastes.

Crawling back up the bed I just stare down at my gorgeous wife's face, I love ther look on her face after she orgasms. Her eyes are half closed and she has this look of pure blissfulness on her face. I pepper kisses all over her face earning myself a cheeky grin from the blonde.

"Damn Rach that was amazing," I hear Quinn mumble out.

"Mmm my pleasure babe."

We just lie there for a while feeling the warmth radiating between our bodies. Quinn kisses me on my forehead and slowly gets out of bed walking to the bathroom, all I can do is stare at her perfectly toned body. She must have felt me starring at her because as I trial my eyes up her body I reach her face and its then I realize she has that damn smirk on her face that makes me weak in the knees.

"Like the view baby," Quinn says with nothing but confidence in her voice.

"You know I have always liked your legs and don't even get me stared on that ass of yours," I counter winking at her and making her blush. She walks into the bathroom laughing as she goes to turn the shower on. Falling back to bed I let out a sigh and curl up in the light blue sheets and start to think about what everything that just happened.

Thinking to myself I realize that this couldn't be a dream because I felt her breath on my cheek, her lips pressed against mine, and the warmth of her body as we made love. The accident and funeral had to have all been a dream, no a nightmare, a really awful torturous nightmare. Before I can think about what happened anymore the bathroom door swings open and I see my wife with nothing but determination in her eyes.

She looks straight at me "I was really hoping you would get that sexy body of yours out of that bed and sneak in the shower with me but since you obviously aren't doing that on your own I'm telling you. Get out of that bed Rachel Berry and get in this shower with me so I can return the favor."

I don't think I have ever moved so quickly in my life. Jumping out of bed I run into the bathroom and get in the shower and am immediately shoved against the cold tile wall and feel nothing but nipping and biting up and down my neck.

Quinn moves her mouth to my ear and takes a long swipe with her tongue before whispering in my ear "I'm about to make you cum so hard that I'm going to have to carry you out of here."

I swear I moan so loud that the neighbors are sure to have heard it. Hell the whole street probably heard that embarrassingly loud moan. It's in this moment that I can do nothing but thank God that I still have this beautiful blonde in this world to call mine.

After a fulfilling time in the shower I throw my hair up and grab my robe and go downstairs to make breakfast. I put my vegan blueberry muffins in the oven to bake and start cooking Quinn's favorite breakfast that of course includes bacon, which I detest but I love the woman so what can you do. Turning the bacon over I start a pot of coffee and scramble some eggs until I feel warm hands around my waist. Leaning back into my wife I catch a faint smell of her strawberry shampoo that I love so much.

I turn around in her arms and give her a peck on the lips and go back to cooking.

"Breakfast smells delicious Rach," Quinn says as she goes to grab a cup of coffee. I nod my head and smile at the compliment, she has always been so appreciative of everything I do for her which makes me want to spoil her even more.

Making our plates we go and sit at the table to have a family style sit down breakfast, which we rarely ever do because we both are always so busy running around. We eat quietly both content with the silence, I sneak sly glances at my wife every so often because lets face it I have a hot ass wife.

Sipping her coffee Quinn looks up at me "Are you going in late to work today?"

"Actually I sent Tina a text this morning and told her I wasn't coming in today, I decided to take the day off."

"Oh well that's good," Quinn replies stuffing her face with the bacon I made her.

"Yeah, that's the benefit of owning your own studio with your best friend. You get to play hooky whenever you want."

"I'm jealous."

"Well I was actually hoping you could take the day off to and we could just spend the day together," I say looking up at Quinn silently hoping she says yes.

"Aww baby you know I would but I have a photo-shoot today and it's a cover shoot so I don't trust any of my assistants to do it. And it has to be done today."

"Oh okay that's fine," I walk off to put our dishes in the sink wishing that we could just have this one-day together. After having that dream about Quinn dying all I want is to spend as much time with her as I can and not her let her out of my sight. I quietly wash off the dishes and clean up the kitchen wondering what I will do with the rest of my day since I can't spend it with Quinn.

I hear Quinn quietly walk up behind "Rach, you're making me feel really guilty with you walking around with that miserable looking pout on your face."

"I'm sorry I don't mean to make you feel guilty I just really wanted to spend the day with you. I just miss you that's all."

"I'm right here baby," Quinn counters with a frown on her face.

"I know, we are just so busy running around all the time and I just wanted to take a minute to slow down and have some time together." "But its okay Quinn I understand this is an important shoot for you," I reply with the best smile I can muster at the time but I can tell by the look on my wife's face she doesn't buy it.

Turing to walk in to the living room I feel Quinn grab my hand and turn me around "I really wish I could stay home with you today there is just no way I can. But how about you come to the office and then to the photo-shoot with me. I know it's not the most entertaining thing to do but at least we can still spend the day together."

I look up to her with the biggest grin "Really? Are you sure, I don't want to be in your way."

"Rach of course I'm sure, you can even help be my assistant if you don't want to sit around. It will be just like in college."

Giggling at the memory of when we were in college, we never spent a moment apart and I would follow her around helping her every time she went to take picture for her classes. I looked so stupid because I never knew what I was doing or where everything was supposed to go. Quinn was always so patient with me and taught me everything about what times of the day were best to shoot and how to get the perfect lighting for her picture. She taught me so much I'm pretty sure now I'm even better than most of her assistants.

"I'll hurry and go get ready," I excitingly say to Quinn as I run up the stairs to get ready.

I'm so excited to spend the day with her I don't think I've ever gotten ready so fast. Running down the stairs I go to grab my purse until I see my wife staring at my outfit and I stop. Looking my self up and down I look back to the blonde "What? I tried to dress comfortable because I knew there would be a lot of walking and moving stuff around since it's as outside shoot."

"Huh? No you look perfect Rach."

"Then why are you starring at me like that baby? I can change if you want me to," I counter looking myself up and down again.

"No, it's just going to be very hard to do my job with your ass looking as great as it does in those leggings. And then I'm going to think about all the dirty things we could be doing at home instead."

I strut over to my wife and put my lips against her ear "You have no idea the dirty sex filled day I had planned for us today too bad we have to go to your work."

Leaving my wife with her jaw dropped open and a stunned expression on her face I go toward the garage and yell back "Come on Quinn we don't want to be late."

After gathering herself we climb into my matte black Mercedes G wagon that Quinn bought me for my birthday and start heading to her office. Turing up the radio and softly singing to the music I feel my wife's hand slowly move from my knee up my thigh. I look up to Quinn who is starring at the road in front of her and notice she has the biggest smirk on her face.

Pulling up to a red light I start to feel myself getting aroused as the blonde's hand is practically cupping me. "Quinn what are you doing?"

She turns her head to me and I swear her smirk gets even bigger "I know what you were doing back at the house. You were trying to tease me because we couldn't stay in today."

"I don't know what you are talking about," I say with an innocent look on my face.

"Two can play that game Berry."

I feel the flutter in my stomach and wetness start at the old nickname she used to call me. With the light turning green I try and focus on anything but Quinn. Ugh damn her she knows when she uses that name it gets me all hot and bothered, this is going to be a very long day.

We walk inside her studio and start packing all the supplies we need to take to the shoot. She walks over to talk to her assistants about the details of the shoot and I grab a seat in her chair. Twirling around in her chair and playing on my phone I don't hear the beautiful blonde back walk in.

"This office has many memories with you in it," the sound of her voice startles me as I turn around to face her. She starts to slowly walk toward me and glides her fingers across the desk.

"Do you remember the last time you visited me at work Rach?"

I shutter at the thought, of course I remember who that hell could forget something like that. Staying quiet I try to turn my chair around and not look at her but she grabs it and turns it back around. We are face to face as she leans down and starts to pepper kisses on my jaw line and neck.

"I can refresh your memory if you would like. It started much like this did, kisses to your neck then I ripped your top off. Took one of your perky nipples in to my mouth and bit it lightly which I know drives you crazy," Quinn explains her voice dripping with sex.

I close my eyes and try to control my breathing but its not working, shit she is so much better at this than me. Her hand moves to the inside of my thigh and she starts to draw small circles.

"I remember having to cover your mouth with my hand to muffle the moans. You never were good at being quiet were you," I whimper at the accusation.

"Then I threw you up on this desk and moved your skirt up and removed those red lace panties, mmm those are my favorite. You were begging for me at this point saying Quinn baby, shit fuck me please." Sitting there in utter silence is all I can do at this point, she moves her hand just inside my leggings and puts her fingers at the top of my panty line staying there.

"I started kissing the inside of your thighs and then shoved my tongue deep inside your…"

Suddenly Quinn removes her hand and starts walking to the door "Come on Rach we got to get a move on if we are going to be able to be set up and ready by 12." I snap my eyes open at her and stare in disbelief, I know she did not just do that. Before I can say anything she is out the door and heading to the car. I have to sit there for a minute to compose myself, I groan realizing I'm going to have to sit through this entire photo-shoot hot and bothered with what I'm sure are ruined panties.

Sitting at the photo-shoot I know I am not much help, every time my wife looks at me I have to look away. I have always enjoyed watching her work but right now she could be dressed up as a clown and I would still be incredibly turned on. Ugh I really thought I would have calmed down by this point but I don't think that's going to happen until we get back home and I can ravish her.

Looking over to her assistant I realize she is doing everything by herself any way I decide to take a walk through the park hoping it will help. As I'm walking I start to think about the dream I had of Quinn dying, what was the dream supposed to mean. Why did it feel so real? I remember the pain, heartache and tears like it really happened. Stopping at this little pond on the corner I watch the happy people walking by and wonder if anyone has ever had a dream like that. Never have I had a dream that felt like that in my life. I watched all of our friends and family mourn her, I had to pick out a gravestone and bury her.

As I wipe away a tear I suddenly feel two arms wrap around my waist and hug me from behind. It scares me at first but I catch a hint of Quinn's perfume and I know its her. Turning around I bury my face in my wife's shoulder and hope she doesn't notice that I've been crying.

Quinn pulls back and looks at me with concern "Baby have you been crying?" I shake my head no but she raises her eyebrow and starts to question me "Rach you know I can always tell when you're upset. Tell me baby what's wrong."

Contemplating whether I should tell her about the dream or not I look into her eyes and softly kiss her lips. In that moment I decide not to explain to her something that I don't even understand myself. She's right here in my arms alive and well, which is the only thing that matters to me.

"Oh I just saw this family walking together and it made me miss my dads, nothing to worry about. You know how emotional I can get," I reply hoping to ease her concern.

"I'm sorry baby. We should fly them up here or take a trip back to Lima soon so you can see them," Quinn counters while rubbing my back.

I smile up at her "Yeah we should plan something."

"I didn't mean to take you away from your photo-shoot Quinn I just wanted to go for a walk."

"You didn't we just finished and my assistant is packing everything up."

"I should probably go help her I feel bad I wasn't much help today but then again that was your fault," I say with a playful tone.

"In my defense you started it and I did say game on," Quinn counters with a smile on her face as she throws her hands up.

She thinks she has this game won but I have one more tease up my sleeve.

"Well you know you got me so hot for you earlier that I ruined a perfectly good pair of panties," she smirks at hearing this.

"And now Quinn I have to walk around this park commando."

I start to walk back toward the set when she grabs my hand and looks at me "Rach, you're not wearing any panties?"

Leaning up against her ear I whisper "Wouldn't you like to know?"

Walking back to the set I smile knowing I have this game won for now. One of Quinn's biggest turn ons is when I'm not wearing any underwear, I found that out in college and man did I have fun with that little piece of information.

After we get back to the house we spend the rest of the night teasing and finally pleasing each other. I have to admit it is one of the best days I've ever had with her, we weren't consumed with our work or busy schedules we just relaxed and focused on one another. And after the nightmare of her dying I want to try and make everyday like that because I don't plan on ever feeling or actually loosing her ever again.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Thanks so much for the reviews, follows, and favorites. I love hearing from you all so keep the reviews coming :)**

**This chapter will switch back to the reality of Quinn being gone but Rachel doesn't realize that at first. I won't ever switch the realities mid chapter at least at the beginning, if I change my mind in later chapters I will let you know. There will be one LONG flashback memory with smut/fluff. But this will mostly be a depressing/angry chapter most of the ones with Quinn gone will be depressing. Sorry about that.**

**Hope you all enjoy.**

I see the sunlight start to shine bright through the curtains into the bedroom, I grab my phone and realize it is already eight thirty in the morning. Rolling over I see Quinn is already gone, she must have snuck out to work early and didn't want to wake me. Throwing my robe on and grabbing my phone I head down to get a cup of coffee and eat breakfast.

Gliding down the stairs I find myself humming and I smile at how happy I am. Yesterday with Quinn was absolutely amazing, we really need to have more days together like that. Brings me back to when we first started dating, I swear we didn't spend more than a few hours a day apart from one another. I go to turn the coffee pot on and I realize there is already coffee hot and ready for me. Quinn must have made extra for me this morning before she left, I will have to send her a dirty thank you text later for that later.

Grabbing the newspaper I sit down at the table and enjoy my delicious cup of black coffee. Suddenly I hear footsteps on the stairs, Quinn must have not left for work yet.

"Hi sweetie. I didn't realize you were up yet," Leroy says while walking in to the kitchen.

Startled by seeing him I spill my coffee all over the newspaper. "Dad, what are you doing hear?" I say running to him and giving him a hug.

"We are staying here for a while sweetie I told you that," Leroy states giving me a suspicious look.

"Good morning," Elijah says sitting down at the table. I get up and give Daddy a big hug as well, I'm just overjoyed that they are here. I smile thinking Quinn must have told them I was missing them but they sure did fly here quickly.

"I have missed you two so much, I'm so glad you are here."

"We have missed you as well sweetie," Dad says looking over at Elijah with a puzzled look on his face.

Elijah looks at me and speaks up "You seem to be doing a little bit better this morning."

"I was pretty sad yesterday thinking about how much I missed you two. Did Quinn tell you that and that's why you got a flight so quickly here?"

Sitting there in silence I look back and forth between my dads waiting for one of them to answer. But neither of them does they just have this mixed look of shock and worry on their faces.

Realizing they aren't going to say anything I chime back in, "You can tell me if Quinn called you, it's no big deal really. I'm actually really happy she did."

Leroy grabs my hand and looks into my eyes, "Rachel, sweetie. Quinn was in a car accident the other day and she passed away. We came down here for the funeral and to be with you remember?"

My heart sinks at the words, I don't even respond to him. Pulling my hand away I run up the stairs into our bedroom, I look all around our bedroom and the bathroom. Finally I look at the night side table and I see it, Quinn's funeral program. I pick up the program and stare at it, what does this mean? Was yesterday really a dream?

Before I can think about it anymore I hear my dads walk in, they walk up behind me and just stand there.

"Rachel. Are you okay? You really had us scared down there," I hear my Daddy say with sadness in his voice.

Ignoring him I sit down on the bed and just stare at the program as floods of thoughts of yesterday swirl around in my head. I had been so sure yesterday that Quinn dying was all a dream. She was hear in my bed kissing me and touching me, I'm just so confused right now.

"Sweetie, talk to us. What's going on?" Dad asks.

"Dad, Can you two just give me a minute?"

"We just want to be here for you and understand," Dad explains with concern.

"What I really need from you two is to get the hell out of my room and give me a minute," I snap.

"Come on Leroy. Let's give her a moment okay. We shouldn't push," Daddy says urging Leroy out of the room.

I shouldn't have snapped at them I know but I can't explain to them what I'm feeling without them thinking I have gone absolutely crazy. Lying down on the bed I try to come to terms with what is going on. How could being with Quinn been a dream? It felt so real at the time, I look at the funeral program one more time and break down.

Having that dream of her still being alive just makes this all harder. I got to experience having her again only to have her ripped away from me, it's like getting that phone call about her accident all over again. Why did you leave me Quinn? I can't go on without her. Everything I've ever seen for myself in the future had her in it, there was never a plan that didn't have her in it.

Starting to feel overwhelmed I decide I can't deal with this and look around for something to help. Talking to someone is just not something I'm ready for right now. I reach under the bed and grab the bottle of vodka that I stashed under there, I've been drinking at night to help me sleep. This isn't the way to handle this but it's the best option I have at the moment. Taking a swig I feel the liquid burn down my throat and sigh at the relief I hope it brings. I continue to take swigs as I lie in bed silently crying while holding Quinn's funeral program.

"Leroy you need to sit down and stop pacing you are giving me a headache," Elijah says as he urges his husband to take a seat.

"I just don't understand what that was this morning with Rachel. She acted like nothing happened and Quinn was still alive," Leroy counters.

"Maybe she just woke up confused is all, this is a big adjust for her."

"I know that Eli but when we told her she acted almost as if it was completely new information that Quinn was in that accident."

"I don't know honey, she is just still processing everything that has happened. I'm just as confused as you are but we need to not push and just be there for her," explains Elijah.

"We should call the therapist that Dr. Miller suggested," Leroy states looking at Elijah with pleading eyes.

"After her little outburst a minute ago I really don't think right now is the right time Leroy. She needs a little more time to herself."

"How much time are we supposed to allow? I just don't want to see our daughter spiral into the darkest depths of depression and not be able to get her back out."

"Leroy, just give her a little bit more time and then we can approach the therapist to her first. I don't think an ambush is the right thing to do for her," Elijah begs.

"But I just want…" Leroy starts but is cut off by Elijah.

"I know honey you want to help I understand that. You have always had this need to handle Rachel's problems for her because you don't want to see her hurting and you want to make her feel better as soon as you can. But this is different Leroy, you can't handle this for her. Trust me on this don't push her or it will backfire on you," Elijah says while getting up and placing a kiss on his husband's head before walking to the kitchen.

Leroy sits there and thinks about what Elijah has said and deep down he knows his husband is right. But he feels so helpless knowing his baby girl is upstairs getting worse and there is nothing her Dad can do about it. It is the most helpless feeling a parent can have in this world. Leroy contemplates what to do and suddenly grabs his phone and starts dialing the therapist's number silently praying that his daughter and husband will forgive his need to fix everything.

Already feeling buzzed from the vodka I wander over to our closet and pull out an old box of memories. The box is full of pictures, clothes, and special memories from the entire time Quinn and I were dating.

I pick up an old t-shirt from a vegan rally I went to and smile at the memory remembering how I drug Quinn out of bed at 4 in the morning to drive three hours to it. She moaned and groaned the whole way about it but the minute we got there and started marching she totally changed. She was running around passing out t-shirts and pins helping me any way she could. I asked her later on the way home what changed her mind and she said it was seeing me speak to people about the cause. She said the passion and drive I had for what I believed in was inspiring and she figured the least she could do was stop bitching and help. She said she had never been more proud to call me her girlfriend.

I smile at the memory, she was always such a charmer, I take another drink and push the t-shirt over to rummage through the rest of the box. Flipping through old pictures I come across our first picture we took together at UCLA. Quinn was going to college there and I was at NYADA, I think back to how big of a turning point this was in our relationship.

_Flashback_

_Deciding on a whim I book a flight from New York to LA to visit Quinn. It has been almost 3 months since we have seen each other and I just can't take it anymore. But there is more to the trip and I have to tell Quinn some big news, I'm just unsure of how she is going to take it. We had already applied to our dream colleges before we started dating our senior year in high school and we decided to stick to the schools we had planned thinking our relationship could handle the distance. I don't think we realized how hard it would be to go from spending nearly every moment together to suddenly spending 3 months apart. Sure we emailed, texted, and skyped all the time but it just wasn't the same._

_Getting onto the airplane I debate whether I should call Quinn or not, I decide not to thinking a surprise would be much better. Honestly, I'm afraid she will tell me I can't come because I can't skip class and jeopardize my scholarship to NYADA just to see her. I text Emily her roommate and let her know I'm coming and to not tell Quinn. I know I'll need her to give her the dorm code so I can get in._

_Next thing I know I'm at Quinn's dorm room door standing there getting the courage to knock. I can't believe that I decided not 7 hours ago to come see her and here I am outside her door like a nervous idiot. I quietly knock but there is no answer, I know she is here because Emily told me she was, I bang a little harder and I hear a muffling sound behind the door._

"_Emily, did you seriously forget your dorm key again. You really need to keep up better with your shit," Quinn yells as she swings open the door and stares at me in shock._

"_Nice to see you to babe," I reply with a giggle at the look on her face like she has seen a ghost._

"_What? How? Did you fly here?" Quinn stutters out._

"_No Quinn I drove for almost 48 hours. Yes I flew here."_

_She still stands there just looking at me with disbelief. I smile up at her and lean in "Are you just going to stand there with your mouth hanging open or are you going to let me in? Because there are some dirty things I want to do to you right now that wouldn't be appropriate in a dorm hall," I say with a mischievous look on my face._

"_Shit, I'm sorry come on in," she replies with a blush forming on her cheeks. _

_Walking in her dorm room I put my stuff down and turn to look at Quinn. God it feels so good to look at her after 3 months, sure we skyped but the real thing is so much better._

"_So Rach what made you fly up here," I hear Quinn mumble out._

_I walk over to her and push a strand of hair out of her face, "I just missed you too much."_

_She smiles down at me, "I know baby I missed you too. But what about school and your scholarship and your…" I cut her off and push our lips together._

_Pulling back I lean into her ear, "You haven't seen me for 3 months. Do you really want to talk right now? Because all I want to do is the dirty things I was talking about earlier."_

_Quinn grins down at me and pushes me up against the door and smashes our lips back together._

_I moan out at the forcefulness, "Mmm that's more like it babe."_

_We make out for a while just missing the feel of our lips being together after so long apart. Quinn pulls back grasping for air and starts nipping my jaw line and down my neck. Making me gasp out as she bites down on my pulse point and soothes it by licking her tongue across it._

"_Quinn, I need you right now. Screw taking our time, fuck me up against this door for all I care," I almost scream out._

"_Mmm, New York has made you a dirty girl Rach," Quinn mumbles out as she thrust her hips into mine._

_Moaning out at the contact I start to pull my dress up staring into Quinn's eyes. She gets the hint and pushes my thong down and pulls my dress off my shoulders exposing my bra._

"_Shit Rach. Baby you are dripping for me."_

"_I need you so bad Q."_

_She glides her fingers through my folds gathering up the wetness and rubbing circles on my clit. Teasing me while just touching inside of me and then returning back to the circles._

"_Jesus Q, I swear if you don't put your finger inside me I will…"I stop when Quinn rams her two fingers deep inside me holding me with her other arm when my knees almost buckle at the pleasure._

"_What was that baby? I didn't hear you finish what you were saying," Quinn smirks._

_Quinn is thrusting so deep inside of me I can hardly talk with how good she feels inside me. "Yes. Ahhh right there Q," I mumble out not even sure if she could understand it._

"_Cum for me Rach. I want you to cum for me," with that and her thumb slamming against my sensitive nub I lose it. I don't even know how Quinn is holding me up right now because I'm pretty sure she has my entire body weight. _

"_Damn Q, that was amazing. I have missed that," I say smiling up at her and giving her a kiss._

"_I love you Rach."_

"_I love you too babe."_

_We spend the rest of the next few hours returning the favor back and forth to each other. When we are finally taking a break when Quinn turns to me, "I'm so glad you are here Rach. But I'm just worried you are going to get in trouble in school or by your Dads for this trip. Are your Dad's mad you flew out here,"_

_Looking away from her I try to avoid answering that question. _

"_Oh my god Rachel Berry. Tell me your dads know you came here!" _

_I look up to her sheepishly, "Define know."_

"_Shit they are going to be so pissed at me," Quinn sighs frustrated._

"_I'm sorry babe, I just had to see you and I made the decision on a whim and I didn't want them telling me no. It's my life anyway, please don't be made at me," I reply giving her my best pout._

_Quinn kisses my pout away, "I'm not mad at you. I'm just worried is all. And you still haven't told me the real reason why you came, I can tell when you're hiding something."_

"_Can we just enjoy the day today and I promise I will tell you later?"_

"_Fine but we are talking about this," Quinn counters._

"_I promise. Now let's do something a little more fun than talking," I say as I slide my hand down her body and cup her._

"_Fuck, Rach," Quinn replies with her hips bucking up into my hand._

_Suddenly the door swings open and Emily comes in, I rush to pull the covers over our naked bodies. Emily sees us and screams out, "Shit, I'm so sorry I forgot Rachel was in town," she quickly walks out and slams the door behind her._

"_Fuck, of course this is the one time she doesn't forget her keys," Quinn mumbles out._

_I giggle at her and quickly throw on some of her sweats and crawl back into bed. Quinn quickly gets dressed and lets Emily back in there room._

"_Enjoy the show?" Quinn smirks at Emily. _

_Emily blushes at the remark, "I'm sorry Quinn."_

_I remember talking and laughing with them for over an hour loving that I was fitting so easily into Quinn's world at UCLA. Secretly I was nervous that the blonde would have this exciting and fun new life that I wouldn't fit into anymore._

_Later in the day around sunset we took a walk while Quinn showed me around the campus. She took me to her favorite stop, it was this beautiful fountain with tall white columns around it._

"_Every time I see this beautiful spot I want to take a picture of it but I wanted the first picture I took of it to have both of us in it," Quinn states as I blush at the sweet comment._

_Smiling at her she takes her camera out of her bag and we take the picture. It was the perfect picture; water cascading down around us with the flawless sunset in the background. _

_After the picture is taken Quinn gives me a gentle kiss and I decide I can't keep this from her anymore "I dropped out of NYADA," I blurt out._

"_You what?" Quinn looks at me questioningly._

"_That's why I came here, to tell you I dropped out. I hate it there; the people are so rude and entitled. I'm so lonely there without you and all my friends, I just couldn't take it anymore."_

"_Rach, please tell me you did not drop out of school for me? We promised we wouldn't do that to each other, I don't want you to resent me later for this," Quinn counters worryingly._

"_Look I'm not going to lie to you, you are a part of the reason but you're not the only reason. I always thought I was destined to be there and preform on Broadway but I just wasn't enjoying it."_

"_You have to give yourself time, you can't just drop out because you are feeling lonely one night."_

"_It wasn't just one night Quinn, it's every damn night. I'm tired of crying myself to sleep every night and waking up dreading to go to class and being miserable. That's not how I want to live my life," I yell out with frustration._

_Quinn looks at me with concern, "How long have you been feeling like this? Why didn't you tell me?"_

_Sighing out I take the blonde's hand, "Because you were having such a great time here and I didn't want to make you feel guilty because I was miserable. NYADA is just not what I thought it would be and I know this is a big life decision but it is one I know I will never regret making."_

_Quinn squeezes my hand and presses her lips lightly against mine, "Then I will support you and support whatever you decide to do next."_

"_Good because I've decided to go to UCLA."_

The sound of the doorbell jogs me from my memory, I hear one of my dads go to answer it. I take another drink and start to feel more than buzzed so I put the vodka down and go into the bathroom to brush my teeth. Throwing some clothes on I walk into the hallway to find my dads whispering outside my door.

"Shit, you two scared me. What are you doing out here? And who was at the door?" I ask them.

"Uhh honey there is someone here we want you to meet," Leroy says as he guides me down the stairs. I turn to look at my daddy and he is shaking his head and pinching the bridge of his nose, which usually means dad has done something that he isn't happy with.

Walking down the stairs I notice an older woman with short brown and greyish hair sitting on my couch. She stands up and smiles at us and I wait for someone to tell me who this woman is and what is going on.

"Sweetie this is who I wanted you to meet," dad says avoiding a straight introduction. He sits me down in the chair across from the couch and the woman speaks up.

"Hi Rachel it's nice to meet you I'm Dr. Judith Daniels," the woman says as she reaches out her hand.

I look at her and then at my dads and by the look on their faces I can guess what kind of doctor she is.

"Nice to meet you too. Now may I ask why you are here?" I ask already feeling myself getting agitated.

"Of course. Your dads are worried about you and how you are handling the death of your wife. I'm here to help get an open line of communication," Dr. Daniels states.

I take a deep breath and try not to blow up on the woman when it's really my dads who need to receive it. But with all the alcohol coursing through my body this doctor is bound to be in the line of fire.

"What the fuck do you two think you are doing? Quinn just passed away and you won't even give me the common courtesy for even a week before you pull some bullshit like this."

"Sweetie, now calm down we are just trying to help," Leroy nervously says.

"No Dad, trying to help would have been to give me the proper time to grieve with this and then asked if I wanted to see a therapist. Not ambush me in my own home with a woman I don't even know."

"Dr. Daniels while I appreciate you coming I think it's best if you leave. I was not aware you were coming and am not prepared to talk about everything right now," I state while turning to glare at my dads.

"And as for you two when I ask you to leave me the hell alone listen next time!"

My dad moves toward me and takes my hand "Rachel, please I just want to help you, I want to help you fix this."

"Unless you can bring Quinn back to me there is nothing that will ever fix this!" I yell back at him yanking my arm away.

Dad takes a step closer to me and leans in "You've been drinking haven't you."

"So what if I have," I state challenging him.

Dr. Daniels is still standing there and decides to chime in "Alcohol is not the answer honey, it will only temporarily take the pain away. I understand the loss you are suffering and I am here to help you."

"Are you married Dr. Daniels?" I ask waiting for her to answer me.

"Yes I am married."

"And is your husband still alive?"

She clears her throat and takes her time to answer me "Yes he is still alive."

Chuckling to myself I start to walk toward the stairs I turn around when I'm at the first step "Then you have no fucking idea the loss I am dealing with right now, so don't act like you do."

Climbing up the stairs I go into my room and lock the door while grabbing the bottle of vodka and taking another drink. I lie down in bed and drink until I pass out just wanting the day to be over with.

Leroy walks Dr. Daniels to the door "I'm so sorry about Rachel she has never acted like this."

Dr. Daniels puts her hand on Leroy's shoulder "Let her grieve right now and discuss when the time is right about seeing a therapist. I understand you are just trying to help your daughter but my clients have to be ready and willing to talk and work through the things going on in their lives. Otherwise therapy just doesn't work."

Leroy shakes his head "Thank you, I'm sorry not being up front with you about that. I appreciate you coming out here."

Leroy walks back in to the house ready to deal with the other Berry that is probably furious with him as well.

"How could you do that Leroy? Go behind my back when I specifically told you that this was a horrible idea and that it could blow up. Well guess what it did," Elijah yells as Leroy walks back into the house.

"Eli, I know I made a mistake I see that now. I'm so sorry," Leroy states with regret.

"You do realize we are going to have to work twice as hard if not harder to get her to open up to us now. I just don't understand what possessed you to do this.

"I feel like we are failing her Eli," Leroy yells out frustrated.

"What?" Elijah asks confusion on his face.

"We are her fathers we are supposed to protect her and take her pain away. And we can't do that I feel so helpless, if I could bring Quinn back and take her pain away I would but I can't Eli. I pray every night for that to happen but I can't," Leroy cries out.

Elijah walks over to his husband and wraps his arms around him "Shhh honey it's okay."

Standing there for a minute just holding each other Elijah pulls back and looks deeply into Leroy's eyes "You are a great father and you love Rachel she knows that. I know you feel helpless right now but all we can do to help her right now is be there for her if she needs us. We can't push what we what or think on her, she has to come to terms with this on her own and we just have to be there if and when she needs us."

"You're right. I'm sorry I pushed this, I shouldn't have done that," Leroy pleads.

"You were just trying to help even if you went about it the wrong way. Rachel will calm down and see that, we just need to give her the time to and talk to her tomorrow if she is ready," Elijah says as he pulls his husband in for another hug. Hoping Rachel will forgive Leroy for his need to control and push things on people.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Hey guys so sorry I haven't updated in a bit my summer class is kicking my butt haha. But I only have 2 more weeks and then I'm done and will be able to update more. And I made this chapter longer than the others to make up for it being up later than usual.**

**This chapter will be back to the reality with Quinn and Rachel starts to realize that she is having alternate realities. There will also be more glee characters in this chapter. There will be some drama with Finn just like in Glee, I love and miss Cory but Finn is the bad guy in this story sorry. Some Rachel POV and some is not.**

**Thanks for all the reviews, follows, and favs. Let me know what you think of this chapter. Thanks so much! **

Slowly I start to wake up and start to dread what the day has in store for me. I really don't want to have to deal with my dads today, I just want to be alone. Looking up at the clock I see it is nine o'clock and I let out a groan. Rolling back over on my side I hear the door open and someone walk in. Maybe if I'm really quite my dads will think I'm still asleep and leave me alone.

I feel a hand on my shoulder and someone place a light kiss against my cheek and then on my eyelids. I shoot my eyes open because there is only one person who has ever woken me up like that.

When I open my eyes I have to catch my breath at the beautiful sight in front of me, Quinn. Not saying anything at first I just stare at her and I feel nothing but pure happiness seeing her stunning face again.

"You are so gorgeous when you first wake up," Quinn whispers.

I grin up at her and take the coffee she has made me.

"I was thinking we could go out and go to breakfast this morning. Go to that little diner down the street that you love so much. After you finish your coffee of course." Quinn says with a smile on her face.

Leaning up I set my coffee down on the night side table and kiss her lips. "That sounds like an excellent plan," I mumble out. 

Quinn pecks my lips once more and gets up from the bed, "Great. I'll let you finish your coffee and get ready. I have a few emails for work I need to finish and then we can go."

"Okay I will be ready in just a little bit babe," I call out to her and she walks out our bedroom door.

I sit up in bed and drink my coffee trying to wrap my head around what is going on. One minute Quinn is alive and well and everything is normal. And then another she has died and I am dealing with losing her. Is this a dream right now or is Quinn dying a dream? What is happening to me, why am I being thrust back and forth between these worlds? I don't understand what is real and what is just a dream anymore.

Groaning out in frustration I walk over to the bathroom and start to get ready. These questions just keep swirling around in my head and I can't make sense of anything right now. Finally, I decide to just let this go for now because Quinn is here alive in front of me and I am going to enjoy every second of it. I'm not going to worry anymore about what is going on, I can deal with that another day.

I throw on a pair of jeans and put on a loose V-neck t-shirt and walk down the stairs. Quinn is sitting at the kitchen table with her laptop and reading glasses on, which I find super sexy.

Walking over to her I place a kiss behind her ear and whisper, "You know I love it when you wear your glasses babe."

"I think you might be the only one Rach," Quinn giggles out lightly.

Grinning back at her I grab the car keys and get my purse.

"I can drive if you won't me to Rach," Quinn calls out as she shuts her computer and walks toward me.

I cringe at the thought of her driving, "No it's fine babe I don't mind."

"Are you sure? I know how much you hate Saturday morning traffic."

"I do not and yes I'm sure," I say as I hop in the drivers seat before she can say anything else about it.

We pull out of the garage and head toward the diner. Turning up the radio my new favorite song comes on and I start to quietly sing along.

_I'm latching on babe, now I know what I have found._

_I feel we're close enough, I wanna lock in your love._

_Now I've got you in my space, I won't let go of you._

_Got you shackled in my embrace, I'm latching on to you._

Feeling my wife staring at me I stop singing and look over to her "What?"

"You have the most amazing voice, I just love it when you sing," Quinn mumbles out embarrassed she was caught staring.

Pulling in to the parking lot I park the car and put my hand behind her neck and smash our lips together. Swiping my tongue against her bottom lip I am quickly granted access. When our tongues touch all I can think is how bad I want to throw her in the back seat and ravish her but I know this is a very public parking lot.

We pull apart gasping for air and I grin up at my wife and can barley contain how happy I am that she is here and everything is normal, well almost normal.

"What did I do to deserve that amazing kiss," Quinn asks.

"You know how much it turns me on when you compliment my singing," I smile up at her and get out of the car.

We walk into the diner and grab our usual booth and wait for our favorite waitress to come help us. Quinn and I found this diner not long after we moved here and fell absolutely in love with the old timey feel and the staff. But our favorite part beside the delicious food is our sixty-year-old waitress Betty. When she met us she said how much we reminded her of her husband and her when they first got married forty years ago. We spent hours just talking and learning about there life and fell in love with her and there story so it just became a tradition that we come here every so often and catch up with her.

"Well if it isn't my two favorite customers, it's been too long," Betty says as she walks up and gives both of us a hug.

We smile up at her and Quinn takes Betty's hand "Hey Mrs. B. How have you been?"

"Oh you know me just keeping these young ones on their toes. You think they would get tired of me stealing all there tables," Betty laughs out.

"I'm sure you are giving them a run for there money," I reply.

"You no it. Now what have you two lovely ladies been up to?"

"Mostly just working," Quinn says with a slightly guilty look on her face.

"What have I told you two about that? Don't work yourselves too hard, you have got to make sure and make time for each other. You have a lifetime to work and make something of yourselves."

"You are right Mrs. B." I reply as I grab Quinn's hand and smile at her.

"Aren't I always," Betty states winking at us. She turns to look at the kitchen when the sound of shattered glass rings through the diner.

"Goodness, these kids these days I swear. I better go check on that, you two want your usual?" Betty asks as she starts to walk toward the kitchen.

"Yes please," we both call out to her.

"I feel bad for whoever dropped those plates because they are about to get an ass chewing," Quinn chuckles out.

"Me too I would not want to be on the receiving end of that, no thank you."

Looking up at my wife I take her hand "She is right though."

"What about kids these days?" Quinn snickers out.

"Well yes but I was talking about what she said about making sure to make time for each other. It got me thinking and I want to say I'm sorry for how much time I've been spending at the studio."

"Rach, there is no need to apologize you and Tina are finally getting a good client base and you have to spend a lot of time with them. And besides I've been working a lot lately too with different magazines and studios so I completely understand."

"I know but I just don't want us to look back and wish we had spent more time with each other if something happens to one of us," I stutter out.

"Rach, baby nothing is going to happen to one of us," Quinn says reassuringly.

"You don't know that Quinn, nothing is guaranteed. Something could happen to you and I would be left with nothing but regret that I chose to build a super successful business over spending time with you," I say tears forming in my eyes.

Quinn gets up and sits down next to me in the booth "Baby, why would you think something is going to happen to me? I'm right here and everything is fine okay, what brought this on?"

Looking up into my wife's stunning hazel eyes I wonder if I should tell her. Why not just tell her you had a bad dream of her dying and that's why you feel this way? But what if this is just a dream? Ugh this is so damn confusing not knowing what the hell is going on.

Deciding not to tell the beautiful blonde just yet I grab her face and press our lips lightly together. "It's nothing babe. Just what she said hit a nerve and I don't want either of us to regret anything okay."

"Are you sure Rach, because I feel like there is more you are not telling me."

"I'm sure babe, I promise."

"How about we make a deal? If you feel like I'm working too much just tell me and I promise I will drop everything and come straight home to you. How does that sound," Quinn asks.

I pull her tightly into a hug "That sounds perfect and I promise to do the same."

We see Betty start to walk back over to us carrying our food and drinks to us.

"You two are just so freaking adorable, you can't go an entire breakfast without sitting next too each other can you?" Betty questions with the biggest grin on her face.

Quinn laughs, "I just can't seem to keep my hands off her."

"Mmm hmm. Well just make sure and keep those hands in friendly places, I don't want to have to hose you two down," Betty counters back.

Grabbing a drink of water I try and hide the blush that is creeping up my cheeks.

"Oops looks like I've embarrassed your honey over here."

"She's just embarrassed because she likes the sound of me not being able to keep my hands off of her," Quinn replies with a smirk.

"Quinn Fabray!" I call out trying to stop the humiliating banter about our sex life between the two.

"Looks like someone is getting in trouble, I'll leave you to get your punishment," Betty snickers as she walks over to another table.

"I'm sorry Rach. You now how we get, we were just joking."

"Mmm hmm," I mumble out as I eat my food trying to forget the awkward conversation that we just had.

"Anyway, I was thinking since we are both off of work today we could just go rent some movies and lay in bed, get our cuddle on," I say winking up at my wife.

"As amazing as that sounds I don't particularly want to be killed by Kurt for skipping tonight."

I look up at Quinn with a puzzled look trying to figure out what she is talking about.

"Rach, don't tell me you forgot. Kurt and you have been reminding everybody about this for weeks now. His big dinner party at his house tonight with the whole high school glee gang together."

"Shit, is that tonight? I completely forgot," I say already dreading going. "Can't we just skip? I just wanted to spend time just you and I tonight."

"Rachel Berry, are you seriously asking me to skip a glee get together that you helped plan?" Quinn asks shocked.

Shrugging my shoulders at my wife and giving my best pout hoping it will get us out of going.

"Are you sure you are ok? Not that I don't mind you wanting to ditch tonight but I'm the one usually begging to get out of these things and you are the one dragging me," Quinn questions still puzzled by what I'm saying.

Before we can finish the conversation Betty walks up and brings us our check.

"It was really good seeing you both, don't let so long go before I see you two again okay?" Betty states with a don't argue with me look on her face.

"We won't Mrs. B, promise," Quinn counters smiling.

We pay for our food and leave our beloved waitress a big tip before hugging her and heading back to the house. I stay quiet in the car trying to think of the right thing to say to get out of tonight but I know it's no use. I honestly don't want to deal with Kurt if we don't show up either. I just feel like I just got my wife back and I don't want to share her, I know that's selfish but I don't really care at this point. Another part of me doesn't want to push Quinn to not go because I know she will question me about it. She is right I always jump at these types of things and I love going to them but I don't want to have to explain to her why all the sudden I don't want to go.

We pull up to the house I walk in and continue to think about how the deal with this when Quinn grabs my hand and turns me around.

"Are you mad at me or something?" Quinn asks with concern in her voice.

"What? No babe of course not," I state as I gently squeeze her hand.

"Well you didn't say a word the entire car ride and even when we got into the house you are still silent. Look if you really don't want to go to Kurt's dinner thing I'm sure we can figure out something to tell him. I just don't understand why you don't want to go all of a sudden."

"No you were right Q we need to go, I helped set up the whole thing and everyone is expecting us."

"Are you sure, you seemed pretty dead set on not going back at the diner. What changed your mind?"

"At first I just wanted to spend time with you just us two but we need to go. Plus it will be fun seeing everybody together, it's been a while since we've all been together," I state trying to convince my wife I'm fine with going.

"Okay. But are you sure this has nothing to do with the fact Finn is going to be there?" Quinn looks at me questioningly.

"What?"

"Kurt told me last night Finn was coming in to town and that he was going to be there. Are you sure you are not worried about him saying something to us?"

I scoff, "No babe it has nothing to do with him. I could care less if he said anything to us, he needs to get over the fact that we are together and married. And anyway Kurt told him he better not start anything so I don't think he will."

Quinn pushes my hair behind my ears and looks into my eyes "I'm just making sure baby. I don't want him bothering you or you worrying about it all night okay."

Nodding my head she pushes her lips lightly against mine and pushes me against the kitchen counter. Quickly I turn her around and push back "I'm going to go take a shower and get ready for Kurt's."

"Wait, what?" Quinn asks with a puzzled look on her face.

When I start climbing up the stairs I turn and look at my attractive blonde wife and she is standing in the exact same spot with the same puzzled look. Chuckling lightly I open our bedroom door and yell down the stairs "Why don't you join me baby?" As I walk in to the bedroom I hear Quinn running up the stairs loudly and burst through the door butt ass naked.

"How the hell did you get undressed so fast?" I ask giggling at her eagerness.

"I'm full of tricks," Quinn states smirking at me.

"Oh really are you now."

"Get in that shower and I can show you what kind of tricks I have," she says as she slaps my ass and jumps in the shower.

Striping off my clothes and climbing in to the shower I can't wait for the tricks she has in store for me.

Driving over to Kurt's I feel myself getting a little bit nervous. I am nervous about seeing Finn since it has been so long, I just didn't want to admit that to Quinn. Finn just has the tendency to either complain about Quinn and I's relationship or he just ignores we are together completely. Both of which irritate the shit out of me but I always keep my calm because I know I have to keep Quinn under control more than myself. I'm also nervous because this is the first time I will be seeing anybody besides Quinn since I've been having the dream of her dying or the dream of her being alive, I'm not sure which is the dream at the moment.

We pull in to the driveway, I take a deep breath and walk toward the door and ring the bell. I hear Kurt's boyfriend Jay call out to him to get the door and I giggle at their banter that they are obviously oblivious to the fact that we can hear it. I feel my wife grab my hand and I sneak a quick kiss before the door swings open and I am greeted with my best friend Kurt.

Kurt grabs both of us and throws us into a hug, "Well hello ladies, you are the first to arrive as always."

Quinn snickers, "You know Rach like us to get here to help you and so she can greet everyone first."

I playfully slap Quinn on the arm and pull Kurt in for another hug, "Thanks for everything."

"Uhh you're welcome but you helped plan this party as much as I did," Kurt replies with a confused expression on his face.

"Yeah I know I just wanted to say thanks." I realize I was thanking him for everything he did for me when Quinn passed away in my dream or reality. He was there for me when I found out and stayed with me until my dads got into town, he dealt with me when I was at my worst and I will always remember that.

I hear Jay come into the room, he walks up and hugs us and says how much he has missed us. Jay is a model and travels a lot, he has been in Europe for a couple of months and just got back. It's hard on Kurt having a boyfriend that is gone all the time but they really do have a great relationship and I couldn't ask for a better guy than Jay for Kurt.

"How was Europe Jay," I ask excited to hear about his travels.

"Rachel, oh my gosh you would have loved it. We traveled to Barcelona, Paris, Rome, London, Prague, and Madrid they were all absolutely beautiful places you and Quinn have to visit all of them. As fun as it was though I missed Kurt way to much, if he wasn't so busy on his book tour he would have gone with me," Jay states with a disappointed look.

"Well the trip sounds amazing. I'm sorry Kurt couldn't go with you but he probably would have complained the entire time any way. You know how much he hates to live out of a suitcase," I say earning myself a glare from Kurt.

"You know it's true Kurt, you are a homebody and always will be," Quinn pipes in.

"You two are not allowed to gang up on me and tell all my worst qualities to my boyfriend. He doesn't know them all yet," Kurt states.

"I'm sure he knows more than you think, you are not very good at hiding any of them," Quinn counters as Jay and I giggle.

Before Kurt can retort the doorbell rings and he walks off to answer it as we continue to giggle at him. We turn to the door and see Tina and Mike walk in, we all greet each other and walk to the bar area to grab some drinks and a few snacks. We all sit and talk about everything that is going on with us but we six see each other the most because Tina, Mike and I work together and Kurt doesn't live far from us.

I walk over to the bar and Tina follows, "Hey Rach. How was your day off yesterday? Did you enjoy the day?"

"Yes I enjoyed it very much thanks for covering for me. How was the session with Ashley?"

"It went good but I need you to work on her vocals on Monday see isn't hitting some of the high notes on her song Drive and she works best with you," Tina replies.

"Okay I will first thing Monday, thanks again for covering for me. I just have been working so much I just wanted a day with Quinn," I say as a give her a big hug because she could never understand how bad I needed that day off to spend with my wife.

Tina and I continue to talk when suddenly I feel strong arms wrap around me and feel a kiss against my shoulder. "Hey Tina, how's everything going?" Quinn asks while she continues to hug me from behind.

"Rachel and I were just talking about her day off yesterday and how much fun you two had," Tina says with a wink.

"Oh yeah thanks so much for that. You have know idea how much fun it was," Quinn retorts with a smirk and a blush creeps up my cheeks.

As I am about to keep the conversation from going any further I hear Kurt yell out, "Rachel quit cuddling all up on your wife and come help me finish this dinner that you promised you would help me with."

Rolling my eyes I turn around and softly peck my wife's lips, "I better go before he gets riled up, I love you."

"Love you too baby," Quinn replies with another kiss on my lips as I walk off to help Kurt.

"Hey Tina can I talk to you about something," Quinn whispers turning around to make sure Rachel isn't listening.

"Yeah sure what's on your mind Q," Tina responds.

"Has Rachel been acting different around you lately?"

Tina looks at Quinn with a puzzled look, "What do you mean?"

"It's just she has been acting really clingy and talking as if something could happen to one of us. She didn't even want to really come tonight, which is strange for her, she lives for these things. And she took off work yesterday and didn't care to follow me around my shoot and I've caught her crying a few times. I don't know I just feel like she is hiding something from me and I wondered if she has said anything to you," Quinn asks worryingly.

"No she hasn't said anything to me. I did find it odd that she took off yesterday because she has been the one pushing to hurry and finish Ashley's new album but I just figured she was burnt out and needed a day. I'm sure it's nothing Q she probably is just stressed from work, we have been crazy busy I wouldn't worry to much about it," Tina replies as she puts her hand on Quinn's shoulder.

"Yeah maybe you're right. I'm just worried about her, will you let me know if she says anything to you."

"Of course Quinn but Rachel never keeps anything from you, I'm sure if something serious was going on she would let you know," Tina replies reassuringly.

"Yeah you're right, I'm probably reading too much into it."

"Sorry to change the subject but how are you doing with the fact Finn is going to be here later," Tina questions.

"Ha. I just don't want him to say anything because Rachel hates it when I let him get to me and go off. She says its not worth it and she is right I just can't stand how he treats her and us," Quinn counter already irritated at the fact he is going to be here.

"I understand but Kurt and the rest of us aren't going to let it get out of hand, we want a nice dinner."

Quinn scoffs, "Is that even possible with this group."

Tina laughs and shrugs her shoulders, "I don't know but it's worth a shot."

I'm really trying to keep my cool in the kitchen with Kurt but I can't stand when he barks orders at everyone because they aren't doing things the exact way he wants them. But I try to remember he just wants everything to be perfect and to go smoothly and I understand that. As I set the table I hear the doorbell ring and more of the glee club pile into Kurt's house, I see Santana and Brittany walk in and then Sam, and Mercedes all join right after. Usually I am the one to be the first to greet everyone at the door but I just don't feel like it tonight, I don't know what's wrong with me but I just don't feel 100% myself.

After I set the table I decide to go upstairs to the bathroom and try to gather myself. Dabbing my face with some cold water I look into the mirror and try to keep from crying. I didn't realize all the emotions I would feel from seeing everybody from glee because every time I look at them all I can see is them at Quinn's funeral. How they were all trying to be there for me and how they were all struggling with the loss of her as well. Okay you can do this Rachel just act like things are normal, everything is going to be okay. As I'm trying to give myself a pep talk I hear a soft knock on the door and my wife's voice on the other side, "Rach, baby are you okay in there?"

Opening the door I let her in and try to act like everything is normal, "Yeah babe I'm fine. I just needed to use the bathroom real quick before dinner."

"You have been up here for a while and everyone is asking about you. Wait have you been crying?" Quinn asks concerned.

I laugh at her accusation trying to throw her off, "No I was cutting up onions earlier and they just bothered my eyes, its no big deal."

I feel my wife staring at me as I turn to the mirror and try to fix my eye make up and I know there is only one way right now to get her to forget about this. Turning to her I jump on the bathroom counter and put my fingers through her jean loops and pull her in between my legs.

"You're so sexy when you are worried about me," I state as I start to pepper kisses on her neck.

I hear my wife moan out as I thrust my hips into her and pull her in for a searing kiss. Wrapping my legs around her I feel the hot blonde slide her tongue into my mouth and I groan out at the contact.

"Fuck Quinn I need you," I sigh out.

Quinn pulls back and smirks at me as she pushes my dress up and pulls my underwear down, "Rach, shit baby you are so wet."

I whimper as I feel my wife's fingers slide through my folds and circle my sensitive nub. "Ugh Quinn quit teasing me there is no time," I groan out as I buck my hips up into her hand.

Just as Quinn slides her fingers inside of me there is a loud bang on the door, "You two need to hurry the fuck up in there dinner is ready," I hear Santana yell out.

Feeling Quinn sliding her fingers back out of me I grab her hand to try and stop her. "Rach baby you know Santana won't stop banging on that door until we come downstairs. Come on I promise we will finish later," Quinn urges as she slides my underwear back up.

"We will be down in a minute Santana," Quinn yells out.

"Ugh fine but this is going to be a very uncomfortable dinner now because I am going to be hot and bothered through the entire thing," I groan out as I straighten my dress and fix my hair.

We walk down the stairs and into the kitchen and see everybody is sitting down waiting for us to start eating and I feel a little guilty everyone was waiting on us. Looking around I notice Finn's seat is empty and I am hoping he decided to skip out on tonight.

"Nice of you two to join us," Kurt says slightly irritated.

"Sorry I had something in my eye and Quinn was helping me get it out," I say apologetically.

Santana turns and looks at me suspiciously, "Come on now Berry. I don't even think Brittany believes that blatant lie, we all know what you two were doing up there."

"I don't know what you are talking about Santana," I say rolling my eyes.

"Well with the sexually frustrated look plastered on your face I'm guessing I either interrupted a little romp in the bathroom or Q seriously needs to work on her skills. Either way Q was helping you with more than your eye," Santana replies with a smirk on her face.

Setting my fork down I am about to give Santana a piece of my mind when Quinn chimes in, "Okay S that's enough okay. Can you ever go more than five minutes without trying to irritate my wife?"

Santana laughs and shrugs her shoulders, "But it's just so easy Q."

Brittany grabs Santana's hand, "San, Q's right leave Rachel alone okay."

"Yeah, yeah alright," Santana replies and goes back to eating her dinner.

There is an awkward silence at the table so Mike chimes in, "So Kurt I read your book made it to the New York Times Bestsellers list. Congratulations that's amazing."

"Thanks Mike, the book is doing so good that they have already signed me on to make it a series," Kurt replies excitingly.

"I knew you could do it honey," Jay says with a proud smile on his face.

I hear Santana scoff at the conversation and everyone turns to look at her, "What? I could write a book and get it on the New York Times Bestsellers list too if I wrote about all my gay fantasies."

Kurt shakes his head, "That's not even what the book is about Santana, maybe if you read it you would know that."

"No thank you, I think I'll pass," Santana retorts back.

"San, you finished the book the other day remember, in fact I think that was your second time reading it," Brittany chimes in with an innocent look on her face.

Santana whips her head toward Brittany, "No Britt that was a different book baby."

Everyone at the table giggles and Kurt chimes in, "Sure Santana."

Santana rolls her eyes, "Whatever, I was just reading it to see what all the fuss is about."

"Just admit you like the book and let it go. It's not going to kill you to admit it," Mercedes states.

Santana ignores her and continues eating her food.

Sam looks at his watch and then turns to Kurt, "Have you heard from Finn? What time is he getting in?"

Everyone goes silent and I can feel everyone staring at Quinn and I but I disregard the looks and wait for Kurt to answer.

"He was supposed to be here by now, I don't know where he is," Kurt replies just as the doorbell rings.

"Guess ogres can feel when they are being talked about," Santana says and I laugh for the first time tonight at something she has said.

Quinn grabs my hand under the table and looks at me, "You sure you're okay with him being here."

"Yes babe I'm fine just as long as he doesn't say anything negative I will be okay."

Kurt gets up and lets Finn in the house and I can hear them whispering in the hall, I'm sure Kurt is telling him to not start anything tonight. They walk in and Finn takes his seat, "Hey everyone, sorry I'm late my plane was delayed an hour."

"Ahh yes how is it in good old Lima," Santana asks earning herself a nudge from Brittany.

"It's fine Santana thanks for asking. I'm the head coach of the football team at McKinley," Finn states unfazed by Santana's comment.

Sam speaks up trying to keep Santana from saying anything else, "That's great man congrats."

The rest of the dinner was filled with small talk and awkward glances between everyone wondering when Finn would say something to us. Surprisingly he didn't say anything negative to us or about us and even congratulated Tina and I on our successful recording studio.

Helping Kurt clean the dishes I let out a sigh of relief at how well the dinner went. Sure Santana shot her attitude out every once in a while but we are all used to it by now and we all know she cares about us deep down. We all sit in the living room and reminisce about the good old days and talk about what each of us is up to now.

"So Quinn what are you and Rachel doing for your three year wedding anniversary coming up," Brittany asks with excitement in her eyes.

I see Finn shake his head and I try to ignore him as I wait for my wife to answer, "We are going to take a trip we are just not sure where yet, still trying to figure that out."

Hearing Finn scoff I decide to speak up, "Is there something you would like to say Finn?"

Everyone stops talking and looks between the two of us, I'm usually not the one to engage him, Quinn is, but I'm just not in the mood to take his shit tonight.

Finn looks at me surprised that I came at him like that, "I just think it's kind of ridiculous she hasn't planned anywhere to take you yet. I wouldn't have done something like that."

I see Quinn give him her HBIC look and I know she is about to go off but I jump at the opportunity first, "And who asked your opinion? You wouldn't have done something like that because you only cared about what you wanted to do, you would have never taken the time and planned a trip with me and made sure we both enjoyed where we went."

Finn scoffs, "That's not true and you know it, if she wouldn't have brainwashed you into thinking I was a horrible guy we would still be together."

Standing up I walk over to him and get right into his face, "First off Quinn did not brainwash me into anything, you broke up with me for another girl and then tried to get back with me when that didn't work out. I'm the one that made the choice not to get back with you because you are a self-centered ass."

"That's bull shit, I.." Finn tries to talk but I cut him off.

"Secondly I'm a lesbian Finn, do you know what that means? I like girls and only girls."

"You don't like girls Rachel! Quinn has brainwashed you into thinking you do but you don't, why can't you see that," Finn yells out.

I see Quinn out of the corner of my eye start to get up but Tina holds her back and tells her to let me tell Finn how I feel.

"You are so naive Finn, no one brainwashes anyone into thinking they like girls. I'm with Quinn now Finn, hell I married her she is the love of my life and you need to get over it."

Finn raises his voice and moves closer to me, "She doesn't love you the way I do, you just got with her to get my attention and now she has you thinking you love her. But you don't I know deep down you love me and you want me as much as I want you. Your relationship isn't real."

The next thing I know I feel the sting in my hand and Finn's face has a red shaped handprint on it and I'm being pulled back by Quinn. I try to move out of her grasp as I continue to try and lunge for Finn seeing nothing but red in my eyes. Kurt takes Finn on the back porch and Quinn shuffles me into the dining room trying to calm me down.

"Rach, baby he isn't worth it okay. Please calm down," Quinn pleads.

"How can I calm down? He said our relationship wasn't real, he thinks I still want to be with him even though I'm married to you! How does that not piss you off?"

"It does piss me off but I know our relationship is real and that we love each other. No one can change my mind on that."

"I know I just, I don't know, I just lost it when he said that."

Quinn grabs my hand and kisses it, "Does it hurt?"

"A little. Can we just go home I don't want to deal with him anymore tonight," I beg.

"Yeah sure let me tell Kurt and grab our stuff okay. Just wait right here," Quinn replies looking back at me to make sure I'm still okay.

I'm waiting in the dining room for Quinn when Santana and Tina walk in.

"Well well, who knew Berry had it in her. I have to say I'm quite impressed with that slap," Santana says amused.

"I think what Santana is trying is say is are you okay?" Tina asks with concern.

"Yes I'm fine Tina thank you. I'm sorry you all had to see that I just couldn't take him saying that."

Tina pulls me into a hug, "You have no reason to apologize, Finn should be the one doing that."

Santana walks closer to us, "Tina is right Berry, Finn was way out of line with that. If that would have been me and he was talking like that about Brittany and I, I would have done a lot worse than a slap to the face."

"Thanks Santana," I reply as Quinn walks up with our stuff.

"You ready Rach?"

"Yeah. Thanks for everything guys, it was so great seeing all of you and I'm sorry for how the night turned out," I say as I walk out to get into the car with head home with Quinn.

Looking out the window on the car ride home I can feel Quinn's worried look staring holes in the side of my head. I continue to look out the window but I grab her hand and give it a squeeze to let her know I'm okay.

We get home and immediately start getting ready for bed but neither of us is saying anything. I lie down in bed and feel Quinn climb in wrap her arms around me.

A few minutes go by and I'm almost asleep when Quinn finally speaks up, "I've never seen you get so mad before, you really had me worried."

I roll over and face my wife and give her a quick kiss, "I'm sorry I worried you. I just have never been so angry with someone. I love you and only you and to hear him say I'm lying just really set me off."

Quinn wipes away a tear rolling down my cheek, "Hey, I know you love me okay. I have never doubted that, he just can't deal with the fact that you are with me and not him. Finn is just bitter and he doesn't know how to deal with us being together but that is his problem not ours okay. You and me Rach we are it okay, we will always be together and that's all that matters."

Quinn holds me tight the rest of the night making me feel more loved than anyone else ever has and she is right this right here her and I is all that matters.

****Song Rachel was singing in the car for a minute was Latch- Disclosure ft. Sam Smith.**


End file.
